Luke 19:37-38:
Right at the crest, where Mount Olives begins its descent, the whole crowd of disciples burst into enthusiastic praise over all the mighty works they had witnessed: Blessed is he who comes, the king in God's name! All's well in heaven! Glory in the high places! Some Pharisees from the crowd told him, "Teacher, get your disciples under control!" But he said, "If they kept quiet, the stones would do it for them, shouting praise."
I have been back and forth since Christmas about writing this blog. I am not sure what holds me back from writing (well....actually I know that it is the bags of emotions that I tote). I am afraid of how people react, how it makes me look, how it makes others feel, and so forth and so on. But God has gently knocked on my heart day after day. The children's song "Ain't no rock" has come to mind a couple of times this week. And then this morning our worship pastor commented about the Rocks crying out in our place, if we don't praise. Funny thing about his comments is that he has said the same thing before, with the same song. But today it was in line with God tapping me.
As many of you know our financial situation is bleak (to say the least) and has been for a while. We have struggled through the past months hardly making it paycheck to paycheck. About 3 months ago I began to think about Christmas stuff. Hubby and I talked a little and I quickly realized that we weren't going to have much in the way of presents. I knew that the kids would have plenty because of grand parents, friends, and Aunts/Uncles so I wasn't desperately worried. But I think at that point I really got a clear picture of how bad we were financially. (I know that presents aren't Christmas, but they definitely represent something. It is one thing the choose to not spend much and another thing to not have it to spend.) As time went on I decided that the money that I would spend on Christmas would be my birthday money. My birthday falls a week before Christmas. I knew that I would get $100-$150 dollars and I could make that work for all of us. Feeling a little bit better going into Nov. knowing that I has some kind of budget made it easier. But slowly things changed. It began with an anonymous gift card of $200 and it snowballed from there, gifts from family and friends and "Elves" just poured in. Sometimes the money bought gifts, sometimes it bought groceries.
A couple of days before Christmas, after I declared I was "Finished shopping", I sat back and looked at our tree. I said to Hubby,"you know what is amazing?" Then I stopped... and said, "never mind I'm gonna keep this one to myself for a while." He just looked at me like I was cooky and went on. Now a week and a half out of Christmas I share.
As I looked at our tree that day I was completely in awe at what God had done for us. He had taken care of us in such a HUGE way. Like I said before, I know that presents and toys aren't "Christmas". But somewhere in the chaos that we call life right now, presents represented stability. I have struggled for over a week to find the words to express why it meant SO much for us to have a tree full of presents. The best I can do is "Love". The presents that filled our living room on Christmas morning were because of the people around us who love us and a God who loves us even more.
The act of giving represents far more than the material value of a gift. It represents a response to a call to action. A call to love.
This Christmas season causes me to do a couple of things.
#1- Praise God! I refuse to let the rocks cry out in my place. My struggle over what to say and how to say it has lasted a week too long.
Let me sing, louder than creation to you....
Let me shine, brighter than the stars in the sky...
#2-Say Thank You! Thank you to all of you who have shown us love is such a huge way. You have prayed for us, given to us, and laughed at us(just kidding....
Maybe;-) You have laughed with us.
Philippians 4:10- 20
Paul writes a thank you. I read this yesterday morning in my devotion in my store. It definitely hit home with all that God has been showing me this Christmas season.
10 How I praise the Lord that you are concerned about me again. I know you have always been concerned for me, but you didn’t have the chance to help me. 11 Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. 12 I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. 13 For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. 14 Even so, you have done well to share with me in my present difficulty.
15 As you know, you Philippians were the only ones who gave me financial help when I first brought you the Good News and then traveled on from Macedonia. No other church did this. 16 Even when I was in Thessalonica you sent help more than once. 17 I don’t say this because I want a gift from you. Rather, I want you to receive a reward for your kindness.
18 At the moment I have all I need—and more! I am generously supplied with the gifts you sent me with Epaphroditus. They are a sweet-smelling sacrifice that is acceptable and pleasing to God. 19 And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.
20 Now all glory to God our Father forever and ever! Amen.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Friday, December 26, 2008
Merry Christmas
I pray that your Christmas was wonderful and full of love. Thank you to so many for doing so much. God is good!
Porcupine
My Favorite NEW tradition that we started this year is one just for hubby and me. We decided that we would buy each other an ornament that represented the past year. Here is mine to him. A Porcupine. (Look closely. It is brown glass.)
My card to him read...... I know that there are many things that stick out over the past year that were painful, but at least I got to go through them with you.
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
2008- It's been a year of GREAT lessons.
Ok, you are not seeing double and NO I didn't mess up and re-post a blog. I wanted to re-post and add a little. I wanted to show how God was so amazing in all of the craziness of the past year. It is pretty cool!
*January*
-Diagnosed with Crohns God taught me to live instead of plan to live
-Missed our mission trip to Guatemala. Thank God I got sick before we left
-Spent a week in the hospital. Family was already planned to be in our home to take care of the kids due to the fact that we were supposed to be out of the country.
-Resigned from church because there wasn't enough money for the entire staff. Stepped out on faith that God would meet our needs. And "our daily bread" is always on time :-)
*February*
-Moved from a house that we could no longer afford. God dropped a job in my lap that we could not pass up. So we moved to Hubby's hometown.
-Moved into Hubby's childhood home. God's timing is incredible! Hubby's childhood home was empty and his parents willing for us to move in.
-I went to work full-time outside the home. Again, the job was just dropped in our lap. A christian bookstore.
-Hubby went to work full-time in side the home. (homeschooling, housing dealing, family sanity maintainer.) The opportunity for our children to see a man (my hubby, their daddy) fantastically step up to the incredible task of homeschooling 2 while and taking care of our home, is absolutely a gift from God.
March-August
- were a little calm. We spent many days at the pool. Trying to drown our $$ problems. Or at least having so much fun that we just forgot about the problems. Rest! even if it was small and/or delusional, it was rest.
*June* Slowly beginning to see the inevitable with my health. We knew that surgery was around the corner. God, gave me a brother who has gone down this road before me. And though my brother may not see it as something SO great, I sure do. His experience and willingness to share have given me so much.
*July* I got a new store manager, and then found out we had a date scheduled for my colon surgery. My new store manager has Crohn's. (Are you serious GOD??) This one was huge. A job dropped in my lap. And at the time that I need surgery, I get a new store manager who has the same disease as me.
*August*
-Surgery at a hospital 1 hour away. Hubby's parents keeping the kiddos. And my stay was shortened because my recovery was great.
-Removed 10inches of my colon. 10 inches must weigh something Right?? So this one we will call weight loss. :-)
-Out of work for 6 weeks. (This was good because it was paid) Hmmm, paid 6 weeks off. With my favorite 5 people on the planet. I'LL take IT! Thanks God.
*September*
-Returned to work. A job that welcomed me back.
-Began to prepare for Christmas at my store.
*October*
-Received foreclosure papers for our home in Maryland.
-Began to prepare for a weekend trip to visit a church for a potential job. A church who knows and understands all of our financial woes, and still wants us to visit.
*November*
-Visited potential church. God opening doors.
-Filed for Bankruptcy. Relief someway, somehow.
-House auctioned off (we think) Closure one step at a time.
-Dental bill that made us poorerererer. Money from amazing places has shown up to help.
*December*
-I turned 30. WOW! I'm still alive.
-IRS is trying to make us pay an INSANE amount of money for taxes that we DON"T owe. I am not sure where God is in the IRS, but I know that he is there somewhere. ;-)
-I had a woman yell at me because I wished her Merry Christmas. I learned that Christmas is not about what we say, but about how we live.
Bottom line.... No matter how many troubles we have.... no matter how many battles we fight.... God remains the same. He is the same this year as he was last year. I am thankful for the lessons that have been learned and the lessons that are yet to be taught.
Merry Christmas.
*January*
-Diagnosed with Crohns God taught me to live instead of plan to live
-Missed our mission trip to Guatemala. Thank God I got sick before we left
-Spent a week in the hospital. Family was already planned to be in our home to take care of the kids due to the fact that we were supposed to be out of the country.
-Resigned from church because there wasn't enough money for the entire staff. Stepped out on faith that God would meet our needs. And "our daily bread" is always on time :-)
*February*
-Moved from a house that we could no longer afford. God dropped a job in my lap that we could not pass up. So we moved to Hubby's hometown.
-Moved into Hubby's childhood home. God's timing is incredible! Hubby's childhood home was empty and his parents willing for us to move in.
-I went to work full-time outside the home. Again, the job was just dropped in our lap. A christian bookstore.
-Hubby went to work full-time in side the home. (homeschooling, housing dealing, family sanity maintainer.) The opportunity for our children to see a man (my hubby, their daddy) fantastically step up to the incredible task of homeschooling 2 while and taking care of our home, is absolutely a gift from God.
March-August
- were a little calm. We spent many days at the pool. Trying to drown our $$ problems. Or at least having so much fun that we just forgot about the problems. Rest! even if it was small and/or delusional, it was rest.
*June* Slowly beginning to see the inevitable with my health. We knew that surgery was around the corner. God, gave me a brother who has gone down this road before me. And though my brother may not see it as something SO great, I sure do. His experience and willingness to share have given me so much.
*July* I got a new store manager, and then found out we had a date scheduled for my colon surgery. My new store manager has Crohn's. (Are you serious GOD??) This one was huge. A job dropped in my lap. And at the time that I need surgery, I get a new store manager who has the same disease as me.
*August*
-Surgery at a hospital 1 hour away. Hubby's parents keeping the kiddos. And my stay was shortened because my recovery was great.
-Removed 10inches of my colon. 10 inches must weigh something Right?? So this one we will call weight loss. :-)
-Out of work for 6 weeks. (This was good because it was paid) Hmmm, paid 6 weeks off. With my favorite 5 people on the planet. I'LL take IT! Thanks God.
*September*
-Returned to work. A job that welcomed me back.
-Began to prepare for Christmas at my store.
*October*
-Received foreclosure papers for our home in Maryland.
-Began to prepare for a weekend trip to visit a church for a potential job. A church who knows and understands all of our financial woes, and still wants us to visit.
*November*
-Visited potential church. God opening doors.
-Filed for Bankruptcy. Relief someway, somehow.
-House auctioned off (we think) Closure one step at a time.
-Dental bill that made us poorerererer. Money from amazing places has shown up to help.
*December*
-I turned 30. WOW! I'm still alive.
-IRS is trying to make us pay an INSANE amount of money for taxes that we DON"T owe. I am not sure where God is in the IRS, but I know that he is there somewhere. ;-)
-I had a woman yell at me because I wished her Merry Christmas. I learned that Christmas is not about what we say, but about how we live.
Bottom line.... No matter how many troubles we have.... no matter how many battles we fight.... God remains the same. He is the same this year as he was last year. I am thankful for the lessons that have been learned and the lessons that are yet to be taught.
Merry Christmas.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
2008- It's been a helluva year.
*January*
-Diagnosed with Crohns
-Spent a week in the Hospital
-Missed our mission trip to Guetamala.
-Resigned from church because there wasn't enough money for the entire staff.
*February*
-Moved from a house that we could no longer afford.
-Moved into Hubby's childhood home.
-I went to work full-time outside the home.
-Hubby went to work full-time in side the home. (homeschooling, housing dealing, family sanity maintainer.)
March-August- were a little calm. We spent many days at the pool. Trying to drown our $$ problems. Or at least having so much fun that we just forgot about the problems.
*June* Slowly beginning to see the inevitable with my health. We knew that surgery was around the corner.
*July* I got a new store manager, and then found out we had a date scheduled for my colon surgery.
*August*
-Surgery at a hospital 1 hour away.
-Removed 10inches of my colon.
-Out of work for 6 weeks. (This was good because it was paid)
*September*
-Returned to work.
-Began to prepare for Christmas at my store.
*October*
-Received foreclosure papers for our home in Maryland.
-Began to prepare for a weekend trip to visit a church for a potential job.
*November*
-Visited potential church.
-Filed for Bankruptcy.
-House auctioned off (we think)
-Dental bill the made us poorerererer.
*December*
-I turned 30.
-IRS is trying to make us pay an INSANE amount of money for taxes that we DON"T owe.
-I had a woman yell at me because I wished her Merry Christmas.
BUT.
I have my health,we all have our health,we have each other, and I have a God who promises to walk with us through all of the crap we go through. I recently heard this song on another blog. I couldn't help but to see how it paints us and our emotions so well.
Whatever your doing inside of me, it feels like chaos but some how there's peace.....
Time to face up. Clean this old house. Time to breathe in, and let everything out.
I believe that you are up to something bigger than me, larger than life, something heavenly.
God, Thank you for 2008. Thanks for not killing us ;-) Thank you for the lessons that we have learned. God I pray that we have shown ourselves faithful to you. I know that we are not guaranteed tomorrow, but, thank you for 2009. And if we don't make it to 2009, then I thank you for heaven because I know that either one has to be better than 2008.
Much love.
-Diagnosed with Crohns
-Spent a week in the Hospital
-Missed our mission trip to Guetamala.
-Resigned from church because there wasn't enough money for the entire staff.
*February*
-Moved from a house that we could no longer afford.
-Moved into Hubby's childhood home.
-I went to work full-time outside the home.
-Hubby went to work full-time in side the home. (homeschooling, housing dealing, family sanity maintainer.)
March-August- were a little calm. We spent many days at the pool. Trying to drown our $$ problems. Or at least having so much fun that we just forgot about the problems.
*June* Slowly beginning to see the inevitable with my health. We knew that surgery was around the corner.
*July* I got a new store manager, and then found out we had a date scheduled for my colon surgery.
*August*
-Surgery at a hospital 1 hour away.
-Removed 10inches of my colon.
-Out of work for 6 weeks. (This was good because it was paid)
*September*
-Returned to work.
-Began to prepare for Christmas at my store.
*October*
-Received foreclosure papers for our home in Maryland.
-Began to prepare for a weekend trip to visit a church for a potential job.
*November*
-Visited potential church.
-Filed for Bankruptcy.
-House auctioned off (we think)
-Dental bill the made us poorerererer.
*December*
-I turned 30.
-IRS is trying to make us pay an INSANE amount of money for taxes that we DON"T owe.
-I had a woman yell at me because I wished her Merry Christmas.
BUT.
I have my health,we all have our health,we have each other, and I have a God who promises to walk with us through all of the crap we go through. I recently heard this song on another blog. I couldn't help but to see how it paints us and our emotions so well.
Whatever your doing inside of me, it feels like chaos but some how there's peace.....
Time to face up. Clean this old house. Time to breathe in, and let everything out.
I believe that you are up to something bigger than me, larger than life, something heavenly.
God, Thank you for 2008. Thanks for not killing us ;-) Thank you for the lessons that we have learned. God I pray that we have shown ourselves faithful to you. I know that we are not guaranteed tomorrow, but, thank you for 2009. And if we don't make it to 2009, then I thank you for heaven because I know that either one has to be better than 2008.
Much love.
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