Pause!

Today I sit unable to write much. Writing for me is an outlet like no other so this is a tough place to be. I have decided to stop my blog until after the new year. One reason is because of the holidays and all that goes with that, but another is because I need to pause. The great thing about the pause button is that it doesn't mean a permanent stop, just a temporary one. Our lives are in the middle of much. I wish that I could poor my heart out, but here in "blog land" is not the place. The only place is to my Father, the Creator of All. I pray that each of you will have a Christmas like none other. I pray that you will get time with family and time alone with Christ. Please pray for our family and my health.

In my devotion today this was a quote that stood out to me. "Rest in God’s grace, knowing that he wants you to succeed at hearing what he says and at doing what he wants you to do. So he’s not tapping his foot, ready to reprimand you; rather, he’s walking on the water, encouraging you to step out of the boat."

God please put your arms around each of us as we go through this season of our lives. I pray that we always stay focused on you and have faith. Help us to believe you completely when you say that you will take care of us. God please hold our hands as we step out of the boat, because we are scared. Thank you in advance for the peace that passes all understanding.


ps. Guatemala is coming...... 31 days and counting.

Standing alone

As the Christmas season has wrapped its arms around all of us I have been addicted more than ever to blog reading. I love hearing the traditions that people participate in and create. My heart is touched to read that people really do still know the true meaning of Christmas. People truly realize that the birth of Christ was the beginning of an event that would play out for the rest of eternity. One blog I read is Losses and Gains and she wrote a particularly beautiful blog about her father (click here). Other blogs have challenged my heart, made me cry, and made me laugh.

Christmas is a time that really joins the hearts of people. It seems like all over the world there are people who are striving to make a difference. As I read and watch I am so encouraged about the heart of people. One thing that I am being challenged with this Christmas is how to deal with this chip on my shoulder. I would love to lie and say that it doesn't exist but it would be just that, A LIE. I carry a chip on my shoulder against people who focus on the materialist side of the holidays. I find myself saying (to my self) "Wow! can you believe that they are spending that on __________?"

"Do they not know that there are children who will die today, because they won't have anything to eat?"

" They could feed a 3rd world country for what they spent on __________. "

I recently saw a video of the President of SouthWestern Baptist Theo. Seminary's house. It is this big to-do at Christmas time. The had trees decorated in every room. With themes from all over the world. People gave up free time to "volunteer" to help decorate. These "volunteers" were proud of all of their hard work and all that they had done for this house. (View Here)
When I think of "volunteering" at Christmas time. I do not think about going into the home of someone who has plenty of money, plenty of food, and WAY TO MUCH TIME, and decorating it. I think about the needy, hungry, the less fortunate.
But here I sat with my chip. I watched the video, all the while being appalled by the $$ and the time that was spent on image. I watch the video wondering if the trees that they have decorated with ornaments from around the world remind them of people. People who have nothing. Nothing to eat, nothing to drink, nothing to sleep in, and definitely nothing to put on a Christmas Tree, much less something under it.

And then I a reminded of some wise words that I read recently. I want to copy them below so that you will be sure and not miss them. This is from another posting on Losses and Gains. These words have forever impacted my Christmas now and to come.


The house is quiet now. Completely, and utterly still. I have been needing this quiet all day. Not because I have needed rest from the noise of my family, but because I have been feeling burdened by the noise of other viewpoints, other perspectives, other versions of what is supposed to be a shared experience. I don't doubt that most people come by their personal views honestly, and with good cause. It is not the grieving, or the lonely, or the broken hearted that I wish to quiet. But there are those who seem to thrive on grumpiness, on complaint, on indignation. The truth is that I am tired of hearing that Christmas is too commercial, too secular, too Americanized, too meaningless. There is validity to all of those arguments, and a mound of evidence behind each of those complaints. But if I allow myself to go there, to join the chorus of discontent, I am the one who will be shortchanged. If I give my energy to hand wringing and fist waving, then I only have less to give to story reading and bedtime prayers. If I grumble and roll my eyes every time I see a Santa mixed in with a nativity scene, then I might miss seeing my daughter's eyes sparkle with delight over every string of lights flung across a bush or rooftop. If I fret and worry that there is no possible way we can pass on our faith to our children without whisking them away to a cave in the mountains, then I have already given in, given up, and the message of Christmas really will have been lost.
I really do understand where people are coming from when they decry all that Christmas has become in our culture. I just can't join in the fray. I need quiet, and prayer, and contemplation, and music, and stories, and laughter, and maybe even some tears. And, for me, the answer isn't to fight the culture, but simply to stand outside it wherever I can, in whatever ways I need. Right now, that might mean a little less blogging and a little more being. Maybe.

I love it where she says, "And for me the answer isn't t fight the culture, but simply to stand outside it wherever I can, in whatever ways I need." WOW!!! These words cause me to lay my chip down. They take the FIGHT out of me. They bring new meaning to "Let there be peace on Earth, and let it begin with me." I am forever humbled.

Bottom line is that one day we will all stand before our King and be held accountable for our lives. It will not matter how my neighbors lived there lives. Or how "The Hat" at Pecan Manor decorated her house, and who spent the "volunteer" hours there. I will stand alone and all that will matter is me and what I did. I pray that as I stand at the feet of the God Most High, that He will be proud of me, his daughter. I pray that my choices now will always reflect His heart.

God help me to not get caught up in what everyone else is doing. Please help me to not judge others for what they are or aren't doing. Help me to not fault others for not having the same passions as me. God please help me to show grace to others, just as you have shown it to me. On that wonderful day, where I stand alone before your thrown, please have mercy on me. Please hand out grace to me one last time for not doing all that I could in all of my days. In the days that I have here on Earth please pave a road for me that guides me to do much for those that cannot do for themselves. Thank you for your unending grace and Love.

Making decisions

As I sit around this morning I have been thinking about the art of decision making. Have you ever known someone who can just walk in to a situation, evaluate it, and make a decision? Now there are two types of people that can do that. #1 Is a wise individual who knows God and who inevitably makes a good decision, because they are grounded in Christ, quick whited, and wise. #2 Is the idiot who thinks that he is quick whited, wise, and inevitably makes the wrong decision. I am not sure which catagory I fall into. Maybe that in itself means that I am a #2. :-)

Making decisions are often difficult because of the ripple effect. If know one was effected by the decisions that we make then it would be much easier to make them. Right now in our lives their are numerous decisions that lay on the horizon. Both with our family and with our church. All decisions that we are facing effect numerous people. The ripple effect is large.William Joseph Slim said, "When you cannot make up your mind which of two evenly balanced courses of action you should take - choose the bolder. " Hmmmm! That sounds fun. The bolder.

The other side of this coin is indecision. I have seen the effects of indecision and they can be just a devastating as if someone had made the wrong decision. Theodore Roosevelt said "In a moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing to do. The worst thing you can do is nothing." Wow, how true that statement is. When someone can't make a decision and they just put it off, it cause frustration, hurt, and eventually bitterness. I pray as we go forward down the path the God has so graciously laid for us, that we will be able to make decisions that point others to Him. I pray that the ripple effect that is felt from any decisions the we or our church makes will be one the empowers people to live for Christ. One that calls others to a deeper commitment with God. I pray that we will be wise and decisive.

God please hold our hand as we walk the narrow path. Please help us make decisions that glorify you and shine your light to the world. Help our own selfish worldly desires to melt away so that we can have a heart like yours. Help us to be bold for you.

Round 758 Ding! Ding!

Today my day began with another doctor's appointment. This was the most anticipated appointment for me yet. Today we hoped to get a diagnosis of my stomach issues.
I met with the surgeon at 8:30am and he had good and bad news. The good news was that I would not need to see him anymore. Yay! No surgery. The bad news was that all test showed that it was Crohn's Disease. (For more info click here.)
This isn't really a shocker for us. We assumed that this was the culprit behind all of my sickness. Next step is for me to get in to see a GI doctor and to begin treatment. Hopefully everything has been caught early enough that medications will be able to give me a "normal" life. The next test for us was going to be getting in to see this GI doctor. They have been telling me that I couldn't get an appointment until Feb. I asked if there was another doctor worth seeing and my surgeon said NO. He was very adamant about getting me an appointment with this doctor. The surgeon's office called this morning, while I was still at the office, with no luck on getting me an appointment. They told me that they would keep trying and give me a call later. I left their and started praying. About 30 minutes later they called me back and had gotten and appointment for me for this Friday. My saviour he can move the mountains, my God is mighty to save. Forever author of salvation, He rose and conquered the grave.
Each time I hear that song I am moved to tears. Because I know that my saviour can move mountains, and nothing seems impossible when we are following him.

Thank you God for giving us hope in a hopeless world. Thank you for giving us peace in a world that is covered with war. Thank you for loving us when we are so unlovable. Thank you for sending your one and only precious son to conquer the grave.

Merry Christmas!

Michael W. Smith

YAY! I love Christmas music. I think I could listen to it year round. I just got the new Michael W. Smith Christmas CD and it is wonderful. I have been a fan for as long as I can remember and this CD is no different. I also love that he has Mandisa on the CD. She is a new fav. of mine. Click on the link on my side bar and you can get some more info. and this cd.

Survivor

Ok so I must admit that I am a reality TV junkie. (For the most part) I love my Survivor, Amazing Race, American Idol, Hell's Kitchen, and Kitchen Nightmares. I do draw the line when it comes to The Bachelor, Dancing with the Stars, and Big Brother. (Sorry if your a fan.)

Right now we are right in the middle of a Survivor season and and Amazing Race season. One thing that always amazes me about Survivor is how they will eat anything. I love the episode where they get to bid on food. These people are willing to pay hundreds of dollars (of course it's not theirs) for a cheeseburger, a plate of fries, chocolate cake, etc. The other crazy thing about the food is how sick it will make them. Here they have been living on practically nothing but rice or beans or something simple like that, and then they are going to gorge themselves on a grease filled, cheese piled, bacon stacked burger. But they don't care! They are so hungry, that they are willing to pay the price and the consequences to be able to eat it.

I feel like I have been living on Survivor for the past couple of weeks. Starving myself because anything I eat is extremely painful. Well today I was done! I was willing to pay any price to eat what sounded good. I finished with some testing that I had done at the hospital and headed for Pizza Hut. First I thought some bread sticks would do me just right, then I thought about a triple bacon cheese burger from Wendy's would also do me right. But I needed to have some restraint. So I went on to Pizza Hut. I pulled up to the drive through and the only thing that came out of my mouth towards that beautiful speaker and that angel that was on the other side, was "A LARGE MOUNTAIN DEW AND A CHEESE PIZZA! " (Yes it was a personal pan pizza, I am not that bad.) As I paid for my food I wanted to kiss the lady for being so fast with my order.
I left and headed home. Prayed that my food wouldn't kill me and thanked God that I was alive to enjoy it.

On a serious note....It has been a tough week. Full of testing and doctor's visits. I am so thankful that everything has moved exceptionally fast and we are moving in the direction of getting answers. I have a doctors appointment Tuesday to go over all of my recent test results. Please pray that God guides the doctors towards all of the answers that we need. Please also pray that the GI doctor's office that I need to get into has openings NOW, so that I don't have to wait until Feb.


As of this moment my "Survivor moment" at Pizza Hut has not effected me. I am standing strong. But if it does put me to bed with pain....I will still say,"That was the best cheese pizza I have ever eaten."

Oh My

In all of my pouting about being sick I almost forgot to brag on my Big Girls. Yesterday we studied St. Nick and Stockings. Yes ok.... it was the sickened down version which meant.... hurry hurry hurry finish in 10 minutes and get to the fun stuff. The "fun stuff" was making a gingerbread house. And because I was feeling so bad, part of the assignment was that they had to do it ALONE!! No fighting! All by themselves.

After a couple "I quit" , "That's Not fair" and "MOM"

This is what they accomplished!!

My God is So BIG....

I love the children's song My God is so Big.
My God is so Big,
So Strong and so mighty,
There's nothing my God can not do.

While sitting around my house over the past days I find myself in a funk. My mind wonders into the "what ifs" of my health situation. I am (by self admission) a pessimist. So when it is time to think positive thoughts or negative thoughts about a situation, I am not usually on the positive side of it all.
Yesterday I was told that I would need to wait until next Tuesday to be able to have a CT scan to begin to find out what is going on with my health. WOW! Almost a week of waiting to take a test that won't give me answers, for another week. I was depressed already. Tuesday seemed so far away, that I would probably have my funeral planned by then.
But God knows all of our fears. He knew exactly what I needed. The doctors office called and rescheduled my CT for Thursday/today. Knowing that I would still need to wait 3-4 days to get results on this test, moving it up was a huge answer to prayer. This morning I went into the test full of fears and worries. I prayed as I laid on the table that God would allow things to go smoothly, I wouldn't get sick, and that answers would come. One by one God has answered my prayers.
One hour after I got home the doctors office called with results for my test. All looked ok but there were some concerns with inflamation of my intestines. (YUCK) I have to go back tomorrow for some follow up stuff and then they will probably end up sending me to a GI doctor next week for more testing. Hubby has been so wonderful being at home with the kids and taking care of me. There is nothing I could even think to ask him to do, because he has already done it. I am so blessed with such a wonderful man.

All of this to say... MY GOD IS SO BIG! He is our comforter when we are sad, scared, and pessimistic. He has held my hand today in ways that my best friend/Hubby could not. He has comforted my heart in ways that only the God of the universe could.

Dear God, Thank you.

Not again!

I haven't blogged in a while because IT is happening again. My stomach stuff. Last Thursday I started feeling a bit under the weather and my stomach was a bit achy. I was very hesitant to inform hubby, because I hate what he had to go through last time. I can just imagine what goes through his head when I say "my stomach hurts". Anyway, I struggled through the weekend and made it to Monday when I finally called the doctor. I went in that morning and she poked and prodded my stomach. She decided to send me for blood work and then we would go from there. In the mean time I just had to suck it and deal with the pain. This is all reminiscent of my gallbladder stuff 2 months ago. Can't eat because of the pain, no energy because I can't eat & can't sleep without drugs because the pain. It is a very hopeless feeling. And in the mean time all I can do it wait. Up until today I have been waiting for the blood work test to come back and then to figure out what the next step will be. The doctors office called this morning and said that everything came back normal. Next step is a CT scan on Tuesday. They are going to scan my abdomen and see what they find.
Last week I was reading about Job and I gained perspective on all of my WOES! The verse that stood out to me the most was this:
20 At this, Job got up and tore his robe and shaved his head. Then he fell to the ground in worship 21 and said: "Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised."
I am so amazed that in all Job had gone through he could still worship. Not just put on a happy face and fake it. But true worship. Not grin and bear it. But true worship. Not smile and nod. But WORSHIP.

I don't attempt to compare my illness to Jobs, or to anyone else for that matter. But what I can tell you, is for me, here, in this home, this sickness is kicking my butt. Please keep our family in your prayers as we go through this and try to figure out what is wrong. Pray that Hubby can press on without growing weary. He is my rock! Without him..... I just don't know. Pray that next Tuesday brings some answers. Please pray hard that everything is solved quickly and won't effect my Guatemala trip in January.

God, please heal my body. Please help me to have a worshipful heart throughout all of this. Help me to not see the hopeless side of things and to only see your side. Please fill me with energy and strength to do all that I need to do in our home. Thank you for you unconditional love.

Mistletoe and Stars

Thursday we learned about Mistletoe and other Christmas plants. To be honest it was kind of a boring lesson. But we did successfully hang Mistletoe in one of our doorways. We will choose use mistletoe as the decoration that symbolizes peace and love (like the Romans) not to ward off evil spirits (like the Pagans).

Today we studied the Star. This one is a little obvious so I wasn't sure how the lesson would go. I didn't know if it would entertain the girls or bore them silly.
*Side Note* It is always amazing how God can use the stories that we have heard 1000x and teach us something new each time.
The lesson talked about what this "star" actually was. If you have seen the Nativity Story you have seen one theory. The theory of planets aligning.


Another theory is a Supernova.

Chinese history actually has dated a Nova about 7bc. and this is yet another theory.


Last one I will mention is a comet. Possibly Haley's Comet.


What ever the "Real" explanation for the miraculous event is, it must have been amazing. Here, God (the maker of all) decides to send his only son as a precious crying little baby into this world. He sends him quietly into the arms of a humble servant. To raise him and love him.

I can just picture this in my mind:

God holding Jesus as a baby. Cradling him in his arms and whispering "Trust me". He gently lays him in the arms of Mary and whispers "Love Him". God steps back, slightly out of sight and begins to orchestrate the night. Cool winds cause Mary to hold Jesus close and Joseph holds them both. In the far off distance a King wants Jesus dead but God whispers "He it isn't time yet". God holds his hands over the stable to protect his son and his Earthly family. God quietly watches and foresees all that will come in his short stay on Earth. Healing, feeding, serving, loving, & dying. As God thinks through His son's life, He stands tall and proud. "My son will save them, if only they will choose Him. He will be the light of the world." God looks out and points (Kind of like a baseball player ready to hit a grand slam). And like nothing the world has ever seen or will see again, BAM! (Emeril just thought he coined that phrase) a new STAR is formed in the sky. He quietly steps back again, folds his arms and smiles. Like all proud Daddy's smile.


Hmmm! Just a thought. Maybe this can be a reminder as we step outside and look at the black sky that is speckled with stars. Let it remind us of "The Light of the World". And how we are called to be a light in the dark world in which we all live. No matter what scientist say, Nothing is by accident.

Matthew 2:1-2
1After Jesus was born in Bethlehem in Judea, during the time of King Herod, Magi from the east came to Jerusalem 2and asked, "Where is the one who has been born king of the Jews? We saw his star in the east and have come to worship him."

Christmas Season has begun

It is official. The Christmas holiday season has begun. Sunday we put up our tree and decorated the house. Yesterday we looked at all of our school work and brought it to a STOPPING point. YAY!! We are setting all of our school work aside for the month of December and focusing on Christmas. Each school day we are studying a new Christmas Symbol.

• Advent Wreath and Wreaths
  
• Christmas Plants
  
• Star
  
• St. Nicholas
  
• Stockings
  
• Christmas Tree
  
• Ornaments
  
• The Nativity
  
• Colors of Christmas
  
• Carols
  
• Christmas Food
  
• Hanukkah
  
• 12 Days of Christmas
  
• Kwanzaa
  
• The Grinch
  
• It's a Wonderful Life
  
• X-mas
  

As we go through these I am going to try and blog about what we learn.

Today was the Advent Wreath and Wreaths. We have done these in the past at church but never here at home. It was interesting for me to see that the girls didn't have a clue about what it all meant. It made learning it all alot of fun. We plan on doing the lighting of the advent candles each Sunday night before dinner. This is something new for us but hopefully this will guide our hearts as we go through this holiday time. One thing that stood out to me the most in all that we studied today was this prayer that is in the material that we are used. This prayer is meant to be said after you light the Christ candle on Christmas eve.

"Lord Jesus, Master of both the light and the darkness, send your Holy Spirit upon our preparations for Christmas. We who have so much to do seek quiet spaces to hear you voice each day. We who are anxious over many things look forward to your coming among us. We who are so blessed in so many ways long for the complete joy of your kingdom. We whose hearts are heavy seek the joy of your presence. We are your people, walking in darkness, yet seeking the light. To you we say, Come Lord Jesus." --Rev. Henri Nouwen

Here is a picture of our wreath. I was very proud. I think that it turned out better than I expected. If you know we at all you know that I am NOT a crafty lady. So this has been one of my finer hours in the wide world of crafts.

Thankful for family

This Thanksgiving was one different from most. Not getting to spend time with family was somewhat disheartening. I am very excited for Christmas. Not only is it my favorite time of the year but we will also have the opportunity to spend it with 2/3 of our parents. (My Mom and Step dad and Hubby's Parents.) 1/3 of the parents we will get to see in the Spring.
As many people have shared their Thanksgiving stories with me, I have heard of couple of stories about family that they weren't to excited to see. Usually it is in laws but occasionally it is siblings, uncles,etc. I understand that some people are hard to "deal" with. Let's face it, the true definition of family should be: friends you can't get rid of. :-)
BUT...... Maybe God makes it so we can't get rid of family, to teach us how to love the people we can get rid of, more. After living in Texas and having many Holidays with no family around. I have learned to appreciate ANY family that we can be with. This Thanksgiving reminded me of that.

As we quickly approach the Christmas holiday I hope that we keep a positive attitude about family. I pray that if you have an opportunity to spend time with ANY family that you will jump on it. I hope that you love them as Christ loves you (and me ;-)) Remember you never know when God could move you to a place where family can't always visit. Family is such a precious gift from God they are people that will love you when you are at your ugliest, prettiest, saddest, funniest, poorest, loneliest times in your life. Don't squander family on emotions that are better left unfelt. If you don't like being around them pray. Pray for yourself that God will change your heart. Pray for them that they will be easier to be with. Pray for your family that God will bind your hearts in a way that the world wouldn't understand.

To all of my family out there that reads this:
I love you all and wish that we could have been together this Thanksgiving. I hope for better schedules next year. I pray for you all everyday.

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13

Courage

Yesterday was a loooooooong day. We (the girls and I) got up and went shopping early in the morning. We were at Kohl's by 4:30am, ToysRus-5:15am, Target-5:45am, Michaels-6:30am, Best Buy-7:00am, OldNavy-7:20am, Chick-fl-a 7:45am, Walmart-8:00am, the Mall-8:45am, and home by 10:30. It was busy! But it was a blast. It was the first time I have ever taken the girls with me on my Black Friday adventure. By the time we got home, they were dragging.

We spent the rest of the day at home. The girls found enough energy to play outside in the cold while I found enough energy to lay on the couch. At naptime I put the little ones down and I went back to the couch. I dozed for a couple of hours. OK not true..... I passed out!

Last night we all sat down to watch Transformers. I was the only one who hadn't seen it and all 3 of the big kids were itching for me to watch it. Daddy started a fire, I put the little ones to bed and then we all snuggled into the living room for a movie. I must admit that I loved the movie. If you haven't seen it, I won't spoil it for you but...... It is one of those "It's the end of the world as we know it" movies. I would compare it to Independence day/Armageddon. It is alot of fun (if you like those kinds of movies). When I watch movies or shows I am always paying attention to "GREAT LINES". You know those lines like... "You can't handle the truth" and "There's no crying in baseball". So last nights movie gave me a great quote:

"Fifty years from now, when you're looking back at your life, don't you want to be able to say you had the guts to get in the car? "

What a great challenge!! I heard that line and I thought.....ooooo ooooo me, meeee, I want to get in that car!! Yeah, I want to be courageous enough to say that I GOT IN! That I didn't let fear paralyze me and keep me from doing all that I could to save the world. I want to know that I had the GUTS to do risk it all.

Then I thought, hmmm, oh how our faith is the same. We have the opportunity to help save the world and yet so many times I don't have the guts to get in the car. Fifty years from now, 70 years from now, I want to stand it the feet of my God and be able to look back and say that I had the guts.

Deuteronomy 31:6 "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you."

God please give me the courage to stand up for you and to share your love with those around me. Please remind me of the message that you have given me to share. Help me to have the guts "to get in the car". Help me to remember that you will never leave me or forsake me.

PS The girls were sound asleep before the movie was half over.

Thanksgiving Day

Yesterday was Thanksgiving. It was a beautiful fall day. We spent the morning together over a small breakfast and then we headed out to the Thanksgiving Feeding. When we got there I discovered that it wasn't the best idea to have brought the the little ones. It was a small church that normally has about 50-75 in attendance, but on this day they would feed around 700. Pretty crazy!! The majority of the feedings that were to happen would be delivered. But that created the chaos of preparing those meals.
Daddy and his 2 big girls lined up on an assembly line and started fixing meals with a large group of volunteers. I was a little disappointed that they didn't have much/if any interaction with people, but it was some good ole fashion hard work. I stayed in they nursery with our little ones and played while the "feeding" was going on.
After we finished at the church, we headed home. We came back to our house and finished preparing some of Thanksgiving favorites and then sat down to enjoy a nice meal. A friend of ours came over at ate with us because his fiance was out of town. But all in all it was a peaceful Thanksgiving.
I am thankful that we could go and help those less fortunate than us. I am thankful that while we prepared food for those people who could not prepare it for themselves, we were blessed enough to have a turkey in our oven and food in our refrigerator.
Thank you God for making us rich with family and love. When times are rough I pray that we can always glance back at days like this and be grateful that they happened.
Blessed be the name of the Lord. He gives and takes away, but I will say."Blessed Be Your Name."

Day 17-WOW

The weather was.......WOW!!! 70 and cloudless. I would venture to say almost perfect. So we went outside to take some pictures. Most turned out pretty good. We had lots of fun so we wanted to share it with everyone. Today I am Thankful for God giving us a WOW! kind of a day. It was just the pick me up that I needed.

Little Man and Little Lady

Just hanging out!

Tree huggers

The big girls took off and all I could get is one of all the kids. But the little ones didn't mind posing for me for a while. I did get a handful of one big sister and her little bro/sis. Here is a slideshow of all the pics I took. God is so good! We are so blessed!

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Day 16-Grocery Day

Yesterday we went grocery shopping. This is my usual Monday event, but on this day I had the distinct pleasure of taking all 4 children. :-) (Please note the sarcasm in my voice, even though you can't hear me.) Boy was it an adventure. I think that the entire town was there and of course everyone wanted the same stuff I did. I should have been smarter than to go shopping this week. But oh well, We needed normal stuff as well as Thanksgiving foods.
Let me paint you a picture of what it looks like when I get the honor of taking all 4 kids to the grocery store.
*1 Double Stroller
*2 2 year olds
*1 Shopping cart
*2 11 year olds
*1 Me
I normally get the little ones lunch on the way into Walmart at McDs. At least this will keep them occupied for a little while. I push the stroller, and the big girls fight over who will not push the cart. This time Shel wanted to push because she wore her Heeleys. As we roll around the store things go good for about 45 minutes. Everyone is team workin it and being very good. The girls switch off going and getting food down aisles for me and the little ones are stuffing their faces. But slowly the situation begins to deteriorate. Big girls start fighting and little ones start getting fidgety. I put it in high gear. I am tossing things in the cart, smushing bread, calling out orders like I'm in the Army, and pushing the stroller like it is an Olympic event. Finally the grocery cart is too heavy and I call SWITCH. Shelby takes the stroller, I take the cart and we are off again.
By the time we are finally headed out, each Big girl has a cart and I am again pushing the stroller.

I think on the way out....
I couldn't do all that I do without my Big Girls. They are such a HUGE help. Yes, they get frustrated. Yes, they fight. Yes, they make messes and don't clean them up. But all in all, they are wonderful. As they become young ladies, they are also becoming my friends. We share laughs together, lunches together, and tears together. I love how they are growing out of that kid stage and we do alot more hanging out. I find that I want to just talk to them. Like I talk to my girls friends. Talking about their likes and dislikes and my likes and dislikes. Talking about what we thought was cool that day and what we hated. Yes, it is a balancing act of being parent and friend, but I with God's help I will hopefully balance well.

I am thankful for Biddy and Shel. I am thankful for all that they inspire me to be and do. I am thankful for the help that they are.

God help them to grow into women that share your heart. God thank you for the blessing that they are to our family. Thank you for making them perfectly fit for our family.

Day 15-Sunday

Sunday's at our house are always long. We have an early morning that usually doesn't stop until late that evening. Yesterday was no exception. The highlight of my day was our small group. We have a group that is meeting together right now every other week. It is a small small group, but I love that. We are studying 5 Love Languages. Hubby and I read it before we got married, but it is great to go over it again. Last night we talked about "Words of Affirmation". It was kind of a quiet evening and no one was really chatty about this topic. We all admitted that none of us thought that this was our primary "love language". But we all recognized the power of the spoken word. And just how nice it is for someone to tell you soemthing that is affirming.
In church yesterday morning the topic was gratitude. Being grateful to God for all that he gives us. Not only being grateful, but telling God about those things.
As I think back on my yesterday I realize that God is laying out a theme for me.

Speaking my Gratitude.

I am a very thankful person, I don't feel like I struggle with "being thankful". But telling people that I am thankful for all that they do is sometimes something that I forget. I also am typically a pessimist, so I tend to see the negative around me and miss the positive. I wonder how much of that comes across as ungratefulness. I realize that every one's love language is not Words of Affirmation. But expressing my gratitude should not be dictated by someones need to be affirmed. Expressing my gratitude should be dictated by my love for Christ. Everything else should be an overflow of my heart. And sometimes when you can not find the words to say, your arms around someone can say it for you.

God thank you for showing me that it is not enough to just "be thankful". I need to express it. Thank you for allowing me two different opportunities yesterday to be taught. Please help me to love people without consideration for anything other than You. Help me to love without boundaries. Without fear. Without distraction. God, thank you for the abundance of so much that you provide each day. God please grant us a peaceful home today, and a home that only points people to you.

Day 14

Does our faith depend on having every prayer answered as we think it should be answered, or does it rest rather on the character of a sovereign Lord? We can't really tell, can we, until we're in real trouble.

I would love to write some great blog and profound thoughts about the question and statement above but I believe I would fail miserably at any attempt to make it more meaningful than it already is. I must confess that my faith does in fact depend many times on the way God chooses to answer my prayers.

God let this be a reminder to me that your character is that of love, peace, and faithfulness. God help me to remember that, when you choose to answer my prayers in a way that is different from what my human mind thinks it should be. Thank you for being able to see further than today, tomorrow, and forever. Thank you for knowing the plans that you have for me, plans to prosper me and not to harm me, plans to give me hope and a future.

Day 13- Friday

Thankful for the little things. I feel a little silly when I talk about the little things that I am so thankful for. But it is days like this when it is "the little things" that help me make it through. Friday we were trying to come to a stopping point with all of our school work, since we will not school next week. Thanksgiving week is one of those times that we all can step back and take a breath without the worry of school. It is nice. So as we pressed on trying to get to that stopping point, we deffinately hit some rough patches. Needless to say by the end of our school day, I was not the favorite person in the room.
One of my little twins loves her paci, so yesterday I decided that maybe we should move in the direction of limitations. I told her that she could ONLY have it at nap time and bed time. (We have tried this before, but I usually loose this battle) This day I had my worrier garb on and I was ready for the fight. I also decided that we would limit juice intake to ONLY meals, all other drinks would be water or milk (We have tried this before, but this too was a battle lost.) But today would be different. I was going to win or die trying.
The day went on with whining and temper tantrums. Both about juice and the beloved paci. I successfully held fast in my decision. They only got a paci at nap time and juice at meals. Little Bear had 2 cups of milk and Patel 2 cups of water so they were doing great. As the evening wore on, I wore down. I was VERY PMSeeeeee, irritable, snippy, hungry, etc. So by about 6:30 I was done! I went and found blankets and pacis and turned on Barney. (They were not even asking for them. They were just running wild through my house. And I couldn't take it anymore)
TADA!!!!! Just like magic. It was silent in my house. They were happily sucking pacis, holding blankets, and watching the Purple dinosaur. And the house was finally still. I could finally stop fighting the battle.

Though I am not sure who won on this day. I am sure of this...... I am thankful for Barney and pacifiers. When I think about it, I guess I am also thankful for the noisy, wild, fight filled day. Because without it the Peace that came later would have felt so divine.

God thank you for being the God of peace. Thank you for each wonderful personality that each of my children have. Thank you for giving me a peaceful home last night. Thank you for giving me strength to endure days like this, that come and always go.

Day 12- Thursday Thanksgiving Thankfulness

Yesterday was a busy day, but a good busy. The kids and I joined 2 other home school families to do a Thanksgiving/Pilgrim study. We read a story, baked journey cakes, and made bonnets. I must admit.... doing things with other home schoolers usually scares me. Home schoolers can sometimes be a little weird. But these 2 families are great and we had a blast. Though my 2 older girls we the oldest there, but they seemed to really enjoy themselves. In fact we came away from our activities yesterday hoping to do more days like that.

We recently found out that we will not have any visitors at our home for Thanksgiving this year. One by one different parts of our family have backed out for various reasons. We all were a little bummed about being alone for Thanksgiving. I informed the kids that we would still have a "normal meal" with all the fixin's, I think that cheered them up a little.

We have mentioned a couple of times to each other about how we wish we could share Thanksgiving with someone in need. Maybe that means we share food, or our table, or our company with someone who is lonely.
Well, ironically yesterday hubby and our other pastors had a meeting with another local pastor, who mentioned a Thanksgiving Day Dinner. This dinner is one that there church does for anyone in need in the community. Our church has agreed to partner with this church and help out. When hubby informed me yesterday that he had "something" for us to do on Thanksgiving I never thought it would be this great. I am so excited that God is opening doors for us to serve. It is very cool to me how God has orchestrated our Thanksgiving Day so that we would be free to go and work at this church. We will take all the kids and be there as long as needed.

God I thank you for the wonderful day that you gave us yesterday. Thank you for giving us a wonderful home school experience to share with our friends. Thank you for the Pilgrims who came to this land to seek out religious freedom. Thank you for allowing them to pave the way for a freedom that hold true today. Mighty God, thank you for opening doors for us to serve on Thanksgiving. I pray that you use us to bless others. I pray that we can serve without being selfish. Though we were sad to not be with family, thank you for clearing our schedule so that we can be apart of something bigger than us.

Psalm 100:3-5 Know that the LORD is God. It is he who made us, and we are his [a] ; we are his people, the sheep of his pasture. 4 Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. 5 For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.

Day 11

Oops I missed day 10. Oh well.

Today I am thankful for my mission opportunity to Guatemala. We met with our team tonight and spent some time in Bible study and Spanish study. It was a great time. I come away being very thankful again that God is laying this opportunity in front of me. I am so excited and with each passing month the anticipation for the trip grows.
Between Hubby and I we have half of the money raised for our trip. Altogether we need a total of $3000. But we are getting there. Sometimes it seems daunting to think of raising another $1500 but I know that God will provide.
Please be in prayer for us as we strive to raise more money and that God will continue to prepare our hearts and ready us for this trip.

God thank you so much for the team you have put together to go and serve the people of Guatemala. Thank you for allowing me to go and to share this experience with my husband. I pray for protection for all of us. I pray that you will bind the enemy from interfering with all that you will have us do. God help us to run and not be weary. Help us to "GO" in your name. Help us to be your hands and feet.

Christmas Conspiracy

Christmas truly is my favorite time of the year. I love all of the decorations, the food, the cold, the presents, the food, the get togethers, the food. I can say with my entire heart,that I love giving gifts much more than I like receiving them. I love watching someone light up as they open the present that I picked out for them. I may have spent hours online looking, I may have been walking the mall and it jumped out and screamed their name, or I may have been in line at 4am on Black Friday just for that special person. Regardless of what I went through to get the gift, I see magic happen when they open it. (Even if the magic only happens in my mind.)

Well for this upcoming season Hubby and I began to talk. In the past we have done 3 gifts for each child. Of course they still get from each other, grand parents, aunts and uncles, friends, etc. So let's just get real, our attempt to simplify Christmas really goes unnoticed because of all the gift giving around us. So this Christmas we have made the decision to not "buy" the kids anything. Instead we are going to create memories. We are going to brainstorm and get ideas of fun things for our family to do and then wrap 'em up. On Christmas morning the kids will unwrap packages that contain pictures of what memories we are going to create. Example: a picture of someone ice skating. Then in the days to follow we will all go ice skating. We will also be focusing on giving to the needy. Our church is going to do a series called Good Will Toward Men. The point is focus on others. We will be giving to charities that are local and global. Basically our church will be challenged to give to the needy ALL of what they would be spending on presents at home. It is a pretty radical idea considering the trends of society.This idea came from a blog called Christmas Conspiracy . Last years spending was around 450 billion for Holiday spending. Holiday spending is defined as spending during the months of November and December. Most retailers make 50% or more of their yearly goals in those 2 months. Imagine for a minute what the world could do with 1 billion dollars let alone 450 billion.

When I think through all of this there is a side of me that is sad. Sad that I won't get to go shop for that "perfect gift". I am nervous that somehow the "magic" of Christmas will be gone. But then I am quickly reminded that it is The World and society who created this magic. It is commercialism that paints the Hallmark Christmas Eve picture in my mind.
The real magic happens when we LoveGod LoveAll.

I pray that this Christmas impacts us for the rest of our lives. God help us to truly impact the world. I pray that new traditions begin and commercialism in our home dies. May we shine your light into the lives of people who do not know you.

Day 9- Monday

Mondays at our house are daddy's day off. What that means is typically I can go grocery shopping ALONE. Alot of times we run errands all together. Which is kind of psychotically fun. It is cool to have another set of adult hands to get things done. Today we needed to return some pants,get gas, go to Target, go to Lowes.
BUT, for some reason we sink into this false reality and THINK that we can accomplish more than any normal human can.
And then it happens.....the moment when reality jumps out from behind the bushes and beats the crap out you. The moment where everything begins to happen in slow motion... you can see it spiraling out of control but you can't stop it...we are standing in the middle of Kohls and all hell breaks loose.
First it starts with the whining," Mommy I not like Kohls." "Mom, look at this." "Mommy I want that elegator (translation: Alligator)""Mom, look isn't this cool". And then it progresses into screaming. "MOMMY I NOT LIKE KOHLS!!" "WEARS MY DADDY" "GIVE ME MY ELEGATOR!"






People are now staring.Oh yeah, and then they start pointing,whispering, and shaking their heads in disbelief.
And then hear it comes....... The Look! (You know, the one where the little old lady looks at you and feels so sorry for you being in a store all by yourself with all those kids.) Yep, that is the look.
I wanted to scream.... "I am not alone my husband is here somewhere. "
"Yes... these are ALL my children. "
"Yes... they are 2 sets of twins."
"No... they do not act like this everywhere."
and then for kicks... " Guess what I HOME SCHOOL :-) "
"Oh by the way yes.... I am nuts."

After Kohls kicked us out (Just kidding!) We went out for dinner. What? I thought money was tight? Yes, money is tight but Mondays are Kids eat Free at Texas Roadhouse. :-)

All in all... it was a great day. There is nothing like a bunch of errands, a screaming fit, some tears, some huffin' and puffin' from our preteens, and a great family dinner out to make you say Thank you God. Thank you for giving me a family that makes memories every single day. Thank you for a day that may have been stressful at moments, but in the end was full of stories to laugh at.

Day 8- Church Day

Sundays! Hmmmm the things that good novels are made of.
You've got lovers and haters. People who come to fix depression. People who come to share happiness. You have both, hard workers and lazy lookers. You've got laughter that will make you cry and criers who will make you weep. Good talkers, bad listeners, life changers & people who's lives have been changed.
I am always amazed at the diversity that a Sunday brings. And I choose to believe that we are the baggage that we carry. Baggage from past churches, other lives, family, jobs, hurts & joys. They all tint the color of the glasses that we see through. Sometimes our baggage fuels us for Christ and sometimes it is the wall between us and Christ. Regardless of who we are, our past defines us.

When I look around on a Sunday morning I see many types of people. All of whom I am thankful for.

• I am thankful for those who have found who they are in Christ and are living it out. They are passionate and joyful about the life the they have been called into. They are the few.
• I am thankful for the lay leaders who balance Monday-Saturday life with church. They are the dedicated who give to the church without asking for anything in return. They are the devout.
• I am thankful for the quiet. The are the ones who have not yet found their voice in church and who may never. Who come to observe and to listen and to pray. They are the silent worriers who fight for us on their knees.
• I am thankful for the healed. They are the ones that were broken by illness, addictions, or life and who now stand tall and tell all. They are the proud.
• I am thankful for the broken. They are the lost who are searching for something to fill a void in their souls. The ones who are shackled by the world and who desperately need to accept the forgiveness of Christ. They are our reason.

Thank you God for each person that I have the privilege of serving along side of on a Sunday morning. Thank you God for allowing us to minister to the broken and to celebrate along side of the healed. Thank you for the worriers that are on their knees for the ministry at Soul Discovery. God may we always see your people through your eyes, with your love and with your purpose.

Day 7

Today I am thankful for a number of things.

1. As I mentioned in my last Blog... I got to sleep in this morning. For those of you who know me you know that I LOVE TO SLEEP. A couple of months ago God was really dealing with me as a Mom and wife and I felt led to give up my "need" to sleep- in. Notice I didn't say I felt led to give up sleeping-in (Because that would imply that I was actually getting to sleep-in). I said my NEED to sleep-in. Each morning I found myself longing for that extra 15 minutes, 1 hour, 3 hours. And when I didn't get it I was bitter and resentful towards my kids and my hubby. God pressed on my heart all of the things that I could do with that extra time and even pressed on me to get up earlier than before. When I began that new phase of my life, I can truly say that life was different, better, good. That doesn't mean that I don't miss sleeping-in, it just means that my priority for doing so has changed. Needless to say on those rare occasions when my darling hubby lets me sleep, I am very thankful.
2. After getting up this morning and breakfast was made and the kids were fed...... (ok wait.... pause.... yep, that is something else to be thankful for)
3. Anyway, after #2 happened I needed to run errands and no one wanted to go with me. YAY!!!!! Alone.... running errands. My music. My Podcasts. My singing. As loud as I wanted. And then I went INSIDE the bank. Hmmm... that is something that I have never done since we have lived here. Can you imagine, me inside a bank, alone. I figured that they would look at me funny if I asked for a lollipop and I didn't have any children with me so I held back on asking. Going inside the bank with 4 kids is frowned on by the general public. Especially the sane part of the general public.
4. I went through McD's and ordered 1 quarter pounder. WOW! ONE of anything is very cool. What? The total is $3.14 not $17.00.

After going out and having some "me" time, I definitely felt refreshed. I was home just in time for my dear hubby's VT game to start and for the little ones to wake from their nap. And I can say that I was ready to take on the afternoon.

Thank you God for my "ME" time today. Thank you for allowing me to have a break from my "mommy" life. God help me to use this day that has refreshed me, to fuel the days that are to come. Thank you for giving me a husband that knows how important it is to me to have "out time". God help me to support him in the ways that he constantly supports me. Thank you God for your mercy and grace that is new every single morning, no matter what time I wake up.

Day 6- Friday a "Normal Day"

Over all we had a normal day. Nothing eventful. Not much to write about. Kind of boring. But it was good boring. The kind of boring that you pray for. The kind of uneventful day that allows you to take a breath. The only excitement we did have was last night we had a house full of kids. (Well when you add three more to our four, it is a houseful.) But even with them over here it was calm and uneventful (YAY!)
For over a year now we have attempted to give our Friday nights to "Date Night". Now "date night" can be one of 2 things. 1. Us keeping all the kids 2. Us getting rid of all the kids. We alternate every Friday with our Pastor and his wife. So one week they have the houseful and next it is our home. It is great on many levels. Even when we have a house full it is alot of fun. Hubby and I are at home, together, focused on mainly the same task......THE KIDS. And of course the other side is going out ALONE with my Hubby.
Over the past months "Life" has gotten in the way and we haven't gotten to do date night. So we attempted to kick that off again last night. Out of last evening comes my thankful list.

1. I am thankful that our home is now big enough that ALL the kids can spread out.
2. I am thankful that Pey Pey and Bear (the 2 year olds) went into their room at 7pm to watch a movie.
3. I am thankful for friends for my children. Friends that I don't have to worry about. Friends that they really have alot of fun with.
4. I am thankful for the fact that when guest come over, eventually they have to leave. :-)
5. I am thankful for my bed.
6. I am thankful that my wonderful husband let me sleep in this morning while he cooked for our crew.

More than anything I am thankful for a normal day. A day that was not filled with bad moods, children that didn't want to do school work, anyone sick, sad, mad, throwing a fit, or dead. It was an uneventful day, so that in it's self was a BLESSING!

Thank you God for allowing us to see "normal", if only for a day, so that we can remember it exists. Thank you God for all of those other normal uneventful days that go unnoticed. Thank you for giving us the foundation of a normal peaceful life. So that when those chaotic days do come (alot) we can rest in the peace that you built our lives on.

Day 5

I can't decide if this is a typical homeschool day or an odd one. Anyway you look at it, it is good for a laugh. So my first thankful thing is this funny picture of our day. Yes, she is wearing a Shrek mask and yes the other one is wearing a snow cap (and it isn't cold in my house).

#2 I am also thankful that I got to get out of the house tonight and go work out. I am not sure that I am as thankful for the work out as I am thankful for the good company. As my friend and I work out we were able to spend some good ole girl time together we talked about our men, our money, and our lives. It was needed and I am thankful for it. It is such a blessing in my life to have her Brenna in my life. She is one of those friends that I don't have to clean my house for. And let's get real.... everybody needs at least ONE of those.

Thank you God for giving me a good laugh today. Thank you for my silly kids. Thank you God for allowing me to get out of the house for some "Me" time tonight. And thank you for giving me Brenna to spend it with.

Day 4-Wednesday

Ok I am a day late on my "Thankful Post". But I only had 30 minutes on the computer yesterday and blogging takes me much longer than that.

30 minutes on the computer you ask?!?

Well let me explain. Yesterday I was the kid. The girls asked me if we could all switch places. They wanted to do "all that fun stuff parents" do. :-0 So, much to their surprise, I said YES!
Our day went something like this:
6:30- Little ones wake up. The big girls rush to be the first ones to get them out of their room. I am impressed by their enthusiasm this early in the morning. They tell me to go back to bed, because they have it under control.
7:15- I get up to take a quiet uninterrupted shower.
7:30- Big Girls cook biscuits and eggs. (Unassisted!)
8:00- I do my school work. (Yes, I agreed to do ALL of their school work if they would do all of what I did.)
9:30- I am finished with my school work. (And I did double the work. Because I did both of their school work.)
9:35- I did the girls daily chores. (Wed. was vacuum, sweep and trash)
7:30-10:00- The girls chased the babies, cleaned up after the babies, chased the babies, changed some diapers, chased the babies.
10:30-12:00 We had to run some errands
12:15- The girls finally clean up from breakfast.
12:30- Big girls attempted to put the babies down for a nap. (THAT DIDN"T HAPPEN) "Will the REAL mommy please step forward?" So I had to go and step in for a moment.
12:40- The girls got to enjoy some rest time and computer time,but not before they cleaned and straightened the house. Then they vegged on the couch and took a deep breath. They were tired. :-)
1:00- I read and sat on the couch
2:30- Babies awake!
HERE WE GO AGAIN!
The girls chased and played, and cleaned after the babies for another couple of hours.
4:30- COME TO JESUS TALK
I could tell that the girls we tired and DONE! I asked them if they were willing to see this through. They still needed to fix dinner and finish the evening. Both of them reluctantly said that they would try. I asked what was wrong and the conversation went like this.
"We are tired!"- Shel
"Yeah, we have to do things for the babies like every 5 minutes."- Biddy
"Uh, every 3 minutes." - Shel
"It is hard work being a mom. I don't just sit around and watch tv and play on the computer everyday." - Me
"Can you make until the end of the day?"- Me
"I guess so."-Shel
"I don't know, we are tired."- Biddy
"I think that you can do it, and I will help."- Me
5:00- We all fixed dinner together. This included emptying the dishwasher and putting dirty ones in. We rested and played quietly for the next hour and all watched some tv together. Because Dad would be out late because of a meeting.
7:30- I helped them get the babies into their room for bed.
8:00- They enjoyed some "adult" tv time ;-) watching Kid Nation. I cleaned and straighten the house this time.
8:15- I read a book.
8:30- Dad came home and we sat and talked. ;-)
9:00- Without hesitation the girls went to bed went to bed.
9:01- I was an adult again, so I sat down to my TV and vegged.


There were many times during my day that I giggled on the inside at how hard they were having to work. While I sat and read and enjoyed MY time. But, I am sure that you can read through that and find many things that I am thankful for. The biggest thing. Homeschooling. I am so thankful that yesterday's lesson was all about LIFE. No, they didn't do any school work. But believe me, they learned alot. I am thankful that we get to be together. I loved seeing them take care of their siblings. They will both make great wives one day.

God thankyou for giving us a day filled with so many lessons. Thank you for last night and the opportunity to show my children what team work looks like. Please help them to never forget yesterday and what they learned.

Day 3

Today I am thankful for a great school day.
Translation: A school day that didn't involve any tears or screaming. (From me or the kids ;) )

The girls are such troopers. Not only do they put up with the toddlers running around but they put up with me. It seems like I change "how we do stuff" once a week.

I am also thankful for the silence of this evening. Ok not really silence. But to have only the sound of MY tv show is something that I would consider to be silence. I am so thankful that at the end of a long day (correction... at the end of a long couple of days) I get to sit down with my Hubby. I get to laugh and play with my best friend and forget all of my woes.

Thank you God for allowing my to home school such wonderful kids. Thank you for giving me a best friend and allowing me to marry him.

A little behind

Oops I was tagged a month ago by Notes from the soul. But I am a little slow to respond. So here goes....





Four jobs I have had in my life:

1. Hostess- I had to wear overalls and it was at a Catfish restaurant. :-0

2. Ace Hardware Girl- Had to call for manure over a loud speaker

3. Store Manager- Enjoyed

4. Mom- Love



Four movies I can watch over and over and over: (Disclaimer: I do NOT like to watch movies again, but if I have to)

1. Pride and Prejudice

2. Dirty Dancing

3. Top Gun

4. First Knight

5. Dora Saves the Mermaid (This is new, but the little ones sit still for 1 hour)



Four TV shows I like to watch:

1. Survivor

2. LOST

3. Brothers and Sisters

4. The Unit



Four places I have vacationed:

1. Grand Cayman

2. Nags Head

3. Bahamas

4. Orlando



Four of my favorite dishes: (Not Restaruant style)

1. Bacon Cheese Burger and Fries

2. Hubby's Steak

3. Holiday Spaghetti

4. Pancakes and Sausage



Four websites I visit daily

1. my blog

2. my friend’s blogs

3. Weather

4. Church staffing.com (ha ha just kidding)



Four places I would rather be

1. Taking a nap

2. Alone at the movie theater with my popcorn and a great new tear jerker

3. On a date with my darling

4. Africa



Four bloggers I am tagging

1. Steven at The (insert Clever Blog Title Here) Blog- So you can have a little fun with writing.

2. Brenna at Dreamer of Much- To learn something new

3. Kenny at The World According to Kenny- So you will write something

4. Becky at In my own Arms- I'm curious.







Hope you all enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Day 2- Of Being Thankful

Hmm where do I begin. I must say that today I am thankful for alot of little things.

I am thankful for:

• My little ones sleeping until I got into the shower. I know this isn't something that my hubby was thankful for. But I sure was. It was great to be able to get up when I felt lI could and go straight to the shower. Instead of being launched out of bed by the screams of a 2 year old. But like I said my hubby wasn't thankful for it. Because while I was in the shower, Little Bear decided to wake up. So Daddy, was launched out of bed by a 2 year old's scream. All of this brings me to my next thing that I am thankful for.
• My Hubby. Who without complaining steps up and does anything I need him to. (Except get me hot fries and a coke when I was pregnant.) He is a hard worker and he takes wonderful care of his family.
• A $380 car repair bill. (Yes, this one is a little hard to be thankful for. Especially when money is hard to come by these days.) I went in to have my brakes looked at and I ended up needing to get all 4 done. Then I told them that I thought my power steering fluid was low and asked if they could check it. They checked it and found a leak in my water pump. AHHHHHH!!!!!!!! It is warrantied but there is a $100 copay. So here is the thankful part.... The warranty saved us $250 dollars. If I hadn't asked for them to check my steering fluid, then I could have ended up on the side of the road with 4 kids and a broken down van.

God is so good to us! He knows my/our needs and He takes care of them in His own way in his own time. I am so thankful that He can see the dangers before I could even dream them.

God help my to see the forest and the trees and to be thankful for them both. Help me to look for the joys of life instead of waiting on them. Thank you for the gift of life and the gift of your grace.

18 days until Thanksgiving / 51 days until Christmas!!

Ok, so here goes. I have read different blogs of people doing 30 days of Thanksgiving so I thought I would jump on board. Yes, I know, I am a little late but I thought better late than never. After all I have 51 days until Christmas. So if anyone does 30 days until Christmas, I will get a jump on them. :-) So Over the next days until Thanksgiving or Christmas (or until I get board with it all) I will give thanks.
DISCLAIMER: I am not a naturally optimistic person so.......please be patient with me. I am sure there will be some blogs that are in here that are not all about being thankful. But I will try. Even if I need to vent about something. I promise to find something to be thankful about.
I pray that through this God will grow me. I pray that He will use this time to make me a more optimist person.


Today I am thankful for my church. I am so thankful to be in a place that we feel loved and cared about. I recognize that in church life there will always be bumps. Sometimes those bumps are in the shape of people and sometimes those bumps are in the shape of circumstances, but there are always bumps. I guess what makes those bumps tolerable, is having people around you to love you through them. Our church is that. We have found deep meaningful friendships in a short time that will last a lifetime. God definitely allowed us to go through some rough times in the past so that we could do ministry at Soul Discovery. I am thankful that our church accepts people for who they are and where they have come from. I am thankful that I can go to church in my jeans. I am thankful that my children can go to church and have friends and feel loved. I am thankful that my hubby has a job that he loves. I am thankful that God allows me to stay at home with my all my children. I am thankful.

Colossians 3:17 And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

Happy Birthday Twins 1.0

11 years ago today I had the pleasure of welcoming 2 of my favorite people in the world, into the world. Little did I know then, where God would land me today. I could never have dreamed in a million years that I would end up with 2 sets of twins, homeschooling and a ministers wife.

11 years ago the most I could dream was giving birth to healthy babies, finishing high school and hoping to go to college. All I knew was that I needed to do this for my new baby girls. My life at that point had been a series of bad choices that eventually caught up to me. When I found out that I was pregnant I was lost. I didn't know which way was up. The one thing I did know, was the amazing love that I immediately felt towards my unborn child. When I found out that was pregnant with twins I was overwhelmed. 17, pregnant with twins, a junior in high school, and a "very" single parent. I had wonderful support of everyone in my family, but that didn't change that it was my life and my children.

God began to work on my heart through these precious little girls. He began to open my eyes to the true meaning of grace. I had always thought (before my babies) that when someone got pregnant outside of marriage it was "GOD'S PUNISHMENT" (boom.... boom.... boom). But from the moment I could feel little angel wings fluttering in my stomach I knew, that a child could never be punishment. Grace by definition is: Undeserved favor or gift. Undeserved forgiveness.
Wow! As I looked in the faces of my beautiful babies, "Grace" was ALL I saw. Undeserved favor. My God loved me so much that entrusted me with the keep of two of His children.

A year and a half after my life was blessed with these angels, I was shown Grace again. God found us the perfect Husband and perfect Daddy. Not many men could step into the shoes that I had created. But this guy was something special. He was gentle and patient. He showed me the love of Christ in ways that you only read about in books. And more than what he showed me, was what he showed the girls. One year after we were married Hubby was able to "officially" become daddy. God had created him for this role. Molded him into the perfect man to handle this task. And given him the will to become that man. In the coming years we would move a couple of times, a couple of states, and have a couple more kids. All the while- B and S were growing into the young ladies that they are today.

B- is the most compassionate person I have ever met. Sometimes it can be interpreted as weakness, crybaby, brat. But deep down it is compassion. Compassion is a gift only to be handed to the strongest. The ones who can handle taking on the problems of the world and wrapping their arms around them in a hug. She is so gentle and mothering. She doesn't understand why the world is mean, she doesn't understand why they all don't just love. She laughs the loudest when things are funny and cries the hardest when things get bad. She is all heart. She is my hero. When I wake up in the mornings I want to be like her. I want to love more and love harder. I pray that she always loves completely. I pray that she shows the world what it means to LoveGod, LoveAll.
S- is the most passionate person I have ever met. Sometimes it can be interpreted as rebellious, smart mouth, angry. But deep down it is fire. Passion can be a gift or a curse. If placed in the wrong hands it can be like Hitler. But in the right hands it can be like Martin Luther King Jr. Passion or lack of is what defines a leader as good or bad. Passion is a gift to be handed out to only the most cogent of people. S, can scream the loudest when she is mad and smile the biggest when she is happy. She is full of extremes. While her sister hugs and cares for the problems of the world, she will fight to change them. She is all spunk. She is my hope. I hope that she will do more with her passion than I have. And live bigger than I ever dream, while changing the world on her journey.

Happy Birthday my beautiful 11 year olds!! Thank you for changing my life and one day the world.

God thank you for entrusting these beautiful young ladies to us for the past 11 years. Thank you for all that they have brought to our family. Thank you for loving me enough to show your grace in such an amazing way. God I pray for the mothers that will never hold their babies because they didn't chose life. God please heal their heart with your mercy and grace. When the pain is to much for them to bare, please hold them close. God help us to all us our pains, so that we can glorify you. Thank you for forgiving us. Thank you for grace.

Catch up not Mustard

I am awful! I just got pictures off of my camera and I realized that they are MONTHS old. It makes it a little hard to keep people updated on our lives with there are numerous adventures to blog about. So I will give you the short trip through our past months.
(Pictures are on the sidebar)

1. Trip to see Virginia Tech with my darling hubby. We called it our anniversary trip. Because we got to go WITHOUT the little ones. We had a blast! I must say, watching football live and in person is so much better than any HD TV can offer. We couldn't have asked for a more beautiful day and I had the best company ever.

2. Trip to Atlanta. We had the opportunity to see my brother and his fam while we were there. Steph. was so wonderful and kept the kids for us while we (Hubby, me, and our church staff) went to a conference.



3. Punkin Patch (as little Bear calls it). We took off out to a big pumpkin patch and let all the kids pick a favorite. It was cool to see their personalities come out in the pumpkins that they chose. Shel- Different shaped kind of funky looking. Very cool. Biddy- Perfect. Normal. Bear- As big as he could carry. Pey Pey- A little baby pumpkin. (so she could be a mommy to it)


Hope you enjoy the catch up. I will try to do better with pictures next time!

Why Blog

As I jump from blog to blog addicted to reading about people's lives I wonder........ why do they write? Why do they share what they share with ANYONE who wants to venture into their blog world and read?

Well here is my answer to that...

I blog because I love to write. At some point in my life I pray that God will allow me to write a book (or 3). My blog gives me a place to keep my mind working and writing. It also gives me a place to empty my mind. At any given point I feel like I have an entire library worth of thoughts swimming through my mind. And lets just get real, being at home with 4 kids doesn't always allow for the greatest of opportunities to share my thoughts.

Why do I share it with the world? Why don't I just journal? I love the thought that somewhere in all the craziness of 2 sets of twins, a life as a ministers wife, a homeschooling family, the nasty smell of chickens on the Eastern Shore, and all the other insanity that comes on a daily basis, that it could inspire or help someone. Or maybe let someone know that they aren't they only one going through "it".

“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too? I thought I was the only one” C.S. Lewis

Maybe somewhere in it all..... Friendships will be born.

Meekness

Do you know the true meaning of the word? I think I thought I knew the meaning. When I imagine the word meek, a lamb comes to mind. When I think of a lamb I think of something calm, snugly, easily eaten. (sorry)


None of these are characteristics (calm, snugly, easily eaten) that I would say are me. But then I opened my devotion this morning and it was about meekness, and my understanding of this word was challenged. The definition of the word is: Showing patience and humility; gentle.

And if I were humble, I would openly admit that none of these characteristics are me either. (But I am prideful and don't want to admit that) I am definitely NOT patient or gentle. As I read scripture I was amazed at how much humility and meekness are used.

Col. 3:12 Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.

Zephaniah 2:3 Seek the LORD, all you humble of the land, you who do what he commands. Seek righteousness, seek humility; perhaps you will be sheltered on the day of the LORD's anger.

Matthew 11:28-29 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls

I always saw meekness as weakness. I think I even saw an element of "weakness" in the suffering of The Lamb of God. I felt like Christ being "weak" was part of the ultimate sacrifice. I have always had in my head that if Christ wanted to come down of that cross He could have. He would have just chosen to be strong and step down. I don't think I have ever looked at it with eyes to see the strength it took him to stay up there. His meekness, His gentleness, His humility WAS His strength.

HMMM..... brings a whole new perspective about being strong willed.

I must say that I am definitely a fighter. I use the term "passionate" when I describe one of my 10 year olds, who is also very strong willed. Definition of passionate: capable of, affected by, or expressing intense feeling .

So my question is can we be both? Can we be meek and passionate? I am not sure of that answer but I do know this.... I was born strong willed and meekness is a choice. So only with God's help can I be the meek person that I He is calling me to be. To me meekness means: Not fighting back, keeping my mouth shut, and completely forgiving people. Not having to be right or first or the best at everything. Just serving. Christ washed the feet of the one He KNEW would betray Him. He broke bread and shared His table with the man who would stab Him in the back and lead to His crucifixion.

God help me to be meek. Help me to be passionate about the things that are glorifying to you. Help me to fight for YOUR causes and YOUR agenda. Help me to not fight back, to not sulk, and to not carry a chip. May the cross always remind me of your ultimate example of strength and meekness innertwind. Forgive me when I am arrogantly strong willed. Help me to choose to be humble and meek.

"GO"

As many of you know, I will have the privilege and honor of traveling to Guatemala in Jan. 08 with a team from our church. This type trip has been something that I have dreamed of for a long time. I have said before, that if God ever said to Hubby "go" (into foreign missions) then I couldn't get my bags packed quick enough.

I have always known that God had placed a calling on my heart for missions. In the past years He has placed a special calling in me for Africa. Specifically dealing on some level with the Genocide in Sudan and the AIDs epedemic. I am not sure how or when but my heart weeps to help. I am brought to tears with the simplest of conversations about Africa. I can't even type without tears swelling.

It is interesting as we prepare for this trip to Guatemala. I find myself sometimes thinking, "HEY God!!! Did you forget how to spell Africa. It is not G-u-a-t-e-m-a-l-a". But then I am quickly reminded that we are call to go into ALL the world, not just one part. I am constantly being stretched and molded by this trip. Having to let go of worries about home, expectations of what I think the trip "should" be, things that I want, and personal issues. Hopefully by the time January comes I will be stripped of my junk and ready to serve, completely.

Last night we had a meeting about this trip. We watched videos and talked about all that is there. It is an interesting emotion that I feel when I look at pictures or videos and hear stories about Guatemala. I am not "astonished" by the poverty, "sicken" by the living conditions, "astounded" that people can live this way,"amazed" "depressed" or "dumbfounded". I looked around the room and saw people who were completely caught off guard by what they saw. But I don't feel any of those things. Maybe it is because that calling on my life came long ago, maybe it is because, as a young child I remember my mom sharing her memories from a trip to the Phillipeans and the poverty that she saw. I don't know. But inside I am SCREAMING, "I GET IT." "I get that people are dying each second." "I get that children are dying from AIDs that their mothers passed on to them." "I get that Americans....specifically christian Americans aren't doing enough." " I GET IT!!!"
BUT WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO ABOUT IT!!! Eight days in Guatemala is not enough.

God of Justice, Saviour to all
Came to rescue the weak and the poor
Chose to serve and not be served Jesus,
You have called us
Freely we've received
Now freely we will give
We must go live to feed the hungry
Stand beside the broken
We must go
Stepping forward keep us from just singing
Move us into action
We must go
To act justly everyday
Loving mercy in everyway
Walking humbly before You God
You have shown us, what You require
Freely we've received
Now freely we will give

Fill us up and send us out
Fill us up and send us out
Fill us up and send us out Lord



What will I do to to follow the command "Go". What will you do where will you go? Is God calling you to Africa, China, your back yard?

God I pray that over the next months that you will break all of our hearts so that we may see that 8 days is not enough. Thank you for sending me to Africa through Guatemala. I know that one day I will go. You have called us to take care of the widows and the orphans, but we have refused. FORGIVE US!! Forgive us for not opening our homes, and our heart to those who need us. God, please "Fill us up and send us out".